Lessons from a Father

May 2nd 1957  -  May 10th 2007

 Robert "ROY" Taylor Jr

"Saying things may not go your way is an understatement."

Sometimes things are going to be harder than you expect but you can't give up. You have to keep at it and figure it out. You make it work or at least make the best of it. My dad never showed or told me everything but, he did show and tell me plenty. I guess that's why I'm always talking and at times I forget to share the floor because I love to work the crowd, those who know me can vouch. Here I am with the sun shining on the front yard, in the house reading/writing instead of finding something to get into. I don't know if this is my passion or some weird phase I'm going through as I test my abilities to accomplish or at least try anything but, I'm starting to enjoy it a little bit. To be honest I would always start writing in my notebook after I got tired of writing song lyrics or just tired of recording and editing the music myself. I actually found this entry inside one of those notebooks so, I figured I'd share it sense I've got this blogging itch lately. 

Anyway let me get back to my story. As I was saying my dad didn't show me everything. In my opinion, now that I look back on it maybe he wanted me to learn and see for myself. Maybe that's why I try my to be more open with my son so he's not smacked in the face too hard by a world that's going to smack you in your face as you grow and venture out. For example one day, I believe I was 19 years old or something like that. He actually lived in the same house my son Trey, my wife Jesse and I call home today. Now separated from my mom for about 6 years at this point. I recall stopping by here having called about 30 minutes prior and telling him I had just picked up a set of brakes for my 91' or 92' Ford Tempo. Riding clean I know but that's here nor there lol. He said, "sure son come on by and I'll pick up 5 quarts of oil for you too! Just pull the front of the car in the garage when you come!" I was like cool "this is going to be a breeze" right?! Thanks pop see you when I get off I said.. 

Mind you, I said he never showed me everything but he told and taught me a lot about plenty. So, I get to the house pulled the car up to the car port easing the hood in the garage. The ramps were laid out so I hopped out and lined them up figuring he wanted to change the oil first. "What's up dad, how you doing etc.." He was kicked back at the table in the garage with the Channel 8 News playing on the TV with the speaker wires hanging on the cinder block wall as an antenna. He was always crafty at making things work. The back of the garage had the Harley propped up on a motorcycle jack as if he had been working on it recently. A normal sight for those Harley lovers, I've learned. I noticed a pair of overalls laying on one of the chairs across form where he was sitting but I didn't pay it no mind. I figured he was going to put them on anyway since he wasn't wearing anything but his factory work clothes. As he finished a can of Miller high life while eating on his heavy seasoned dozen of blue crabs, with a pile off empty shells next to him on a crab juice soaked newspaper, he asked me, "You still got that book that came with the car when I bought it?" I said yea of course its in the glove compartment or in the back of the seat pocket I think. Shit I didn't know for real I had no need for it. Besides whenever he was in the garage when I was younger it was always go back in the house.. Not because he didn't want to see me but because, "aint nothing but grown folks out here" lol. As I find myself saying that to Trey now.  "You want any crabs son or a cold beer with a chuckle and a big grin?" Nah I'm good pop, knowing I loved some crab meat but I really hated all the damn work that went into getting that little bit of meat out. Yea I know I know but, that was just me at the time (lazy). 

Totally unaware of what he really had planned, this man said, go ahead and look in the index (he was always trying to show me the right or proper ways to do and say things, some people take it the wrong way because they fear what they don't understand) to find the pages for brakes and oil. I got the tools already out for you laying on the floor right here beside me and the jacks over there for when you finish changing the oil. I'll be here to make sure you do it right but, you're going to do it yourself [grabbing another Miller high life out of the fridge near the TV]. 

"What if I wasn't here son, you going to pay somebody 200, 300 and some dollars every time there's a problem? Do you have $200 that's what you're going to need if you cant do it yourself out here." "Anything man made Robbie is going to break down eventually that's why I keep telling you to get an education so you can get a good job, have some insurance on your car etc.." Of course I was payments behind, at 19 whaat.. I needed that extra spending money, I'd pay it later.

"If you cant to fix things yourself somebody will be glad to take your money"  

To sum up this lesson. A man must find his own way ultimately. For the males, especially teenagers, with out a strong male or, father figure, mentor, motivator, role model, or just a positive hard working person who cares to say the least, with out that presence the journey is that much more difficult. Not impossible by any means just a bit more difficult.

There's also the possibility of the male or wiser adult's environment to be a negative influence. As for me, I've enjoyed the fruits of both negative and positive people that I have looked up to at a young stage in life. Nothing wrong with that but I've also known the difference between the two as well. Maintaining that focus of being better than that and productive still came from God and my parents. 

They embedded that into me.

-FLOETSPEAR

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